Our heroes continue on their long quest to New Civilatham! Who do you think they meet in the woods this week? Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think.
We have more exposition for you this week, friends! The story arc is moving at a clippy little pace, and who do you think comes to help drive it along this week?
I won’t spoil the surprise for you, but that ‘somebody’ our heroes meet in the woods is sick. And kinda brownish.
Kudos to Peter for pulling off that voice for an entire episode. His whole, shuddering body was fairly wracked with visible discomfort as the voice slowly took him over. We all watched in horror as my brother became the Sick Brown Riding Squirrel.
Oops, I guess I spoiled the surprise.
On another note, I have announced that this great show, the Malex Minute, will be going on hiatus in the Spring of 2010. We will be completing this story arc, completing Quarter Sixteen, and completing an astonishing four years of unbroken weekly production.
Not to fret though! We’re not going away… Please see the announcement for more details.
“Christmas is in one week and I haven’t even begun my shopping yet. Does this make me a brave anti-Christmas-commercialism rebel, or just a terrible friend and loved one? You decide.”
Snufflefungus: Those little flying creatures were so cute!
Malex: Yeah, cute.
Snufflefungus: We should have kept one!
Mara: I’m not sure, Snuffy. They seemed to like to bite Linus and Malex.
Snufflefungus: But that’s just because Linus is mean!
Mara: What about Malex?
Malex: Am I mean?
Snufflefungus: Well, no…
Malex: So why did they bite me?! I rolled around screaming for thirty hours!
Mara: Was that screaming? It sounded like you were pretending to be a wild animal.
Snufflefungus: I don’t have all the answers, Malex. Maybe they were confused. You can look mean sometimes.
Mara: You do have something of a “Big, Scary Man” presence. Only later, after people get to know you, do they discover what a total dork you are.
Snufflefungus: Linus, don’t you have anything to say?
Linus: (Pouting.) No!
~~ Branches rustle.
Malex: Nobody say it.
Linus: Say what?
Malex: Nobody say, “What was that?!” It’s just getting too old.
Mara: I know I’m getting sick of it.
Snufflefungus: So how do we inquire as to the cause of such auditory phenomena?
Malex: Well I dunno, just do it some way that’s not so clichéd.
Linus: Oh dear! What could possibly be the cause of such an auditory phenomenon?!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: It’s’a me! Sick Brown Riding Squirrel!
Mara: Oh! Put it out of its misery!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: With enough medicine, the misery is manageable!
Mara: But you look like you’re falling apart!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: That’s why I need my medicine!
Linus: He’s talking about drugs, isn’t he? This is a veiled reference to substance abuse.
Snufflefungus: (Gasps.) No!
Malex: Sick Brown Riding Squirrel, your medicine is just escapism, not a solution!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: Who cares about a solution?! The whole world is about to end anyway!
~~ Seismic tremor.
Mara: I really wish the planet would stop shaking like that.
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: Oh, it’ll stop! It’ll stop when it’s been reduced to a fine, charred powder!
Malex: Presumably we’d like for it to stop before it gets to that point.
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: It doesn’t matter what you’d like! You’ve never seen his face! (Reduced to a fit of coughing.)
Linus: Oh, his cough has a green spray.
Malex: Sick Brown Riding Squirrel, we’ve been sent on this quest to help! Are you telling me there’s no hope?
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: Hope? If–
Linus: You’re evading the question, you stupid mangy rodent!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: (Awkward silence.) I don’t remember the question.
Malex: Can we help prevent the destruction of this planet?
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: You don’t get it, do you? We’re not talking about the destruction of a planet, we’re talking about the systematic destruction of the entire universe!
Snufflefungus: But… Where will we live?!
Mara: Why would this planet’s destruction doom the entire universe?!
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: Because, the last time he went on a rampage, this was the only planet we could find with the power to restrain him! If those restraints crumble now, with him in New Civilatham, this whole planet will be destroyed, and there will never be any hope of restraining him ever, ever again!
Malex: He’s in New Civilatham now?!
Mara: Malex, you don’t know who we’re talking about. It could be the muffin man.
Malex: Oh, that’s right.
Snufflefungus: The evil muffin man. With an Uzi!
Linus: Guys, Sick Brown Riding Squirrel is dead.
Malex: What–? Oh.
Mara: He is pretty slumped over there.
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: (Coughs.)
Snufflefungus: Sick Brown Riding Squirrel, what can we do?
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: Inject me with something strong.
Mara: No, what can we do to help avoid the destruction of the universe?
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: If you want to help, you must go to New Civilatham. I don’t think Little Red Riding Squirrel’s plan will work, but the others… They believe! (Dissolves into a fit of coughing and wheezing.)
Snufflefungus: Little Red Riding Squirrel’s plan?!
Linus: That is the single most frightening thing I’ve heard yet!
Malex: I will admit to being deeply concerned by this latest bit of information.
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: (Still coughing.) Now, give me some medicine! Any medicine!
Malex: We’re not going to do that.
Sick Brown Riding Squirrel: (Collapses, wheezing.)
Mara: And he’s down again.
Malex: Okay, Linus help me carry him.
Linus: What are you thinking?
Malex: Not much, apparently. Snuffy?
Snufflefungus: I have all the bags!
Malex: Oh yeah. Mara?
Mara: I’ll pass. Thanks for offering though.
Producer and Director: Alex Markley
Writers: Alex Markley, with input from Peter Markley and Gabriel Markley.
Voices: Markley Brothers, with a guest appearance by Leela as Mara.
Post-processing director: Leela
Illustration: Peter Markley
Release manager: Peter Markley
Recording assistance: Aisling
Thanks to everyone for their help and support.