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Malex Minute 177

Malex, Linus, and Snufflefungus escape to a hotel. Will Snuffy finally be safe? Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think.

Episode Audio

Malex's Thoughts

Oh no! Whatever will happen to our heroes?! Oh yeah, I know exactly what’s going to happen. But you don’t! Ha!

It’s so good to be me.

On an unrelated note, I may be a little behind the bandwagon on cheesy 90s video game references, but I’ve been wanting to say, “Snufflefungus, I choose you!” for a long time now. No one can deny me this small joy.

As you can tell by listening to it, this episode is critical in the overall plot-arc we’ve embarked on. And it’s funny, too! So give it a listen, will ya’?

Enjoy, and have a good week!

ttyl!

——Alex Markley

“Boy, don’t you know better than to stare at the sun?! You’ll scald your brain!”

Transcript

~~ Introduction

Malex: Phew! We can finally sit and rest in the safety of a hotel room where nobody can ever find us!

Linus: What are you talking about? We pulled up in a vintage convertible. Our group contains a floating laptop and a talking furball. I’m pretty sure the hotel staff noticed.

Malex: Oh, don’t be pessimistic.

Linus: That’s like asking ice to not be cold.

Snufflefungus: (From other room.) Malex? What does ‘discreet’ mean?

Linus: I thought you were the dictionary master.

Malex: Snuffy, why do you want to know?

Snufflefungus: (From other room.) There’s all this stuff on the TV! It says billing is ‘discreet.’ What does that mean?

Malex: Are those the things on the TV that say, ‘adults only?’

Snufflefungus: Yeah…

Malex: Well, when they say, ‘adults only,’ what they really mean is, ‘idiots only.’

Snufflefungus: Oh. That would explain why all the plot synopses sounded dumb.

Malex: Snuffy, turn that TV off and come over here.

Linus: Well, all I’m saying is that I’m pretty sure somebody noticed.

Malex: Nobody’s knocked on the door yet, have they? I figure that’s a major win.

~~ A knock on the door.

Snufflefungus: (Squeals.)

Linus: Great. Now they know somebody’s in here.

President Anchorman: (Through door.) Have no fear, dear pickles! It is only I, the president of this fair nation.

Malex: (Opens door.) Oh, uh– Oh, sorry Mr. President. Please, uh… come in.

President Anchorman: Thank you. There has never been a better time to be free!

Linus: We’re not free. We’re trapped in this hotel room because we’re hiding from the public at large.

President Anchorman: Snufflefungus, if I may be so bold, how do you do your hair?

Snufflefungus: I have a lot of it, so it’s a process.

President Anchorman: I’m only asking because I want to be just like you when I grow up.

Malex: So who tipped you off that we were here?

President Anchorman: I and the bellboy have been friends before, and he called me on my cellular phone device!

Linus: Wow.

President Anchorman: Snufflefungus, you should know, this fair nation is suffering. Suffering like a red-headed stepchild on the morning after Christmas! Money is no object, and by that I mean that money is a flat, and rectangular object. It comes and goes like the tide, but a flood will kill you.

Malex: Are you saying that the economy is suffering because Snufflefungus dumped so much cash into it all at once?

President Anchorman: Presently.

Linus: How did you ever learn to interpret his inane ramblings?

Malex: It’s a gift.

President Anchorman: The moral of the story is that only I have the dainty skill to distribute money properly. And you all, sirs, have demonstrated your woeful incompetence in the matter like a man who butters both sides of his bread. How can you know which side it will fall on?!

Malex: Excuse me?

President Anchorman: When you butter both sides of the bread! How can you know which side it will fall on when you drop it? It’s a mystery!

Snufflefungus: But no matter which side it falls on, there will always be a side that’s clean enough to eat!

President Anchorman: (Gasps.) You astound me, young Snuggle Frumpus! I must go fund experimentation immediately!

Malex: You do that.

Shadow: Good evening, all of you. Nobody move.

Linus: (Screams.)

Malex: Who are you and why are you here?

Shadow: I represent a secret government organization dealing in matters of the paranormal.

President Anchorman: That man has a gun. One time I had a gun. It was back during the war–

Shadow: Shut up!

Malex: You just told the president to shut up.

Shadow: I know exactly who it is. This is the man who finally led us to Snufflefungus.

Snufflefungus: What?! You’re here for me?!

Shadow: Oh yes, Snufflefungus. We’re here for you. You demonstrated, on national television, the most impressive telekinetic powers our organization has ever witnessed. Needless to say, we want them for ourselves.

Linus: President Anchorman is a goober, but why would he lead you to Snufflefungus?!

Shadow: Not willingly, I assure you. President Anchorman has been our puppet for years.

President Anchorman: I feel shame.

Shadow: Everything he knows, we know.

Malex: Wait a minute. President Anchorman has seen Snuffy do all sorts of amazing things before. Why didn’t you try to capture him before?

Shadow: It’s not a perfect system. Our puppet is perpetually drunk. There are many things that go on in his head that we don’t really want to investigate.

Linus: That makes a lot of sense.

Malex: You realize of course that you can’t have Snufflefungus.

Shadow: You realize of course that there’s nothing you can do to stop us.

Malex: Snufflefungus, I choose you! Flaming Spatula Maneuver, now!

~~ Awkward silence.

Linus: Nothing’s happening.

Snufflefungus: My powers don’t seem to be working.

Shadow: That’s our dampening field. Your powers won’t work inside it.

Malex: Well, Plan B involves lots of screaming.

Shadow: Sure, give that a shot.

~~ Malex, Linus, and Snufflefungus scream.

~~ End

Credits

Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writer: Alex Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Leela

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Peter Markley

Recording assistance: Leela

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

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Episode Audio3.57 MB Download Now - 3.57 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Episode Illustration186.87 KB Download Now - 186.87 KB View Now - Episode Illustration

Comments

lol...

Awesome ^__^

A lie would have no sense unless the truth were felt as dangerous.

LOLz

"Help me help me, I'm aware of my toes" ?!??!?! 0_0 Wow... XD

I love it!!!! This one was really funny, causing me to convulse in laughter. :-J

One little thing I would change is making the "awkward silences" a bit more drawn out and more awkward ;)

Malex's Thoughts said:

Oh no! Whatever will happen to our heroes?! Oh yeah, I know exactly what’s going to happen. But you don’t! Ha!

It’s so good to be me.

LOL!

Linus: How did you ever learn to interpret his inane ramblings?

Malex: It’s a gift.

XD _I_ sure wouldn't be able to interpret them! 0_0

Snufflefungus: But no matter which side it falls on, there will always be a side that’s clean enough to eat!

President Anchorman: (Gasps.) You astound me, young Snuggle Frumpus! I must go fund experimentation immediately!

well, Pete's sake...I would just eat both sides... ;)

Snuggle Frumpus?!?!?! :-| Care to repeat that, President Anchorman??? :-|

...

After consulting with myself, I have come to the conclusion that Malex would make a better President than President Anchorman. ^__^ And I'm sticking to it! =D

I liked Shadow's voice ^__^ A low, deep & raspy whisper was all you guys needed to scare me to death x_x

=D Did Quartz do that or Malex? I can't tell :P

Amazing episode, everyone :) Thoroughly enjoyed it =D

oh and btw, I like the way of drawing ;)

Praise the Lord! Hallelu!

I don't care what the devil's gonna do!

The Word and faith is my sword and shield

And Jesus is Lord of the way I feel!

Mariel 7's picture

Wow ... ^____^

Great episode guys!!

Favorite Exchange:

Malex: Wait a minute. President Anchorman has seen Snuffy do all sorts of amazing things before. Why didn’t you try to capture him before?

Shadow: It’s not a perfect system. Our puppet is perpetually drunk. There are many things that go on in his head that we don’t really want to investigate.

Linus: That makes a lot of sense.

SCI-EENNNNCE!!!! @_@ - Dr. Insano

*lol*

Great episode everybody!!! The dialog was especially funny this week!

btw...the shadow scared me.... 0_0

God gave us music, that we might pray without words

Peter's picture

Super-Awesome Fop-Fop

gnnb94 said:

Did Quartz do that or Malex? I can't tell :P

It was our own and dear Fopsworth. ;)

Glad you like it, everybody! :D

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

O_O

REALLY!?!!??!? :O

I thought for sure it was Qz or Malex... 0_0

Excellently done, Foppy!!!!! 0_0

Praise the Lord! Hallelu!

I don't care what the devil's gonna do!

The Word and faith is my sword and shield

And Jesus is Lord of the way I feel!

Ya know...

I'm trying to decide if President Anchorman is really good at getting away from the Secret Service, the Secret Service men don't care/like the President, or if they just plain gave up on him a long time ago.

Malex said:

Snufflefungus, I choose you!

Score! X-D

That Shadow voice sounds like it hurts to do. :-(|

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Very Funny!

I loved this episode, guys. It had a ll the elements that I've come to love and expect from the Minute. And as you know, President Anchorman is one of my favorite characters.

President Anchorman: Snufflefungus, you should know, this fair nation is suffering. Suffering like a red-headed stepchild on the morning after Christmas! Money is no object, and by that I mean that money is a flat, and rectangular object. It comes and goes like the tide, but a flood will kill you.

I really enjoy listening to this bozo talk.

Foppy, that was a great job with the shadow voice.

I'm anxious to see where this story arc will go.

Wonderful work, guys! I needed that laugh.

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

LOL!!

this episode is hilarious! And the shadow voice is really good... and creepy

Graduation is coming, everybody grab your caps and gowns!

Lilly's picture

Rofl!

I keep listening to this episode and it keeps making me laugh XD Even the shadow thing, even though it creeps me out 0_0

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

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