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Malex Minute 170

Malex, Linus, and Snufflefungus look over their photo album and reminisce. Horror! Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think!

Episode Audio

Malex's Thoughts

What happens when you run out of interesting things to say? You string lots of gags together in a plotless jumble and call it a day!

Sorry, things aren’t really that bad. I’m just playing up the situation for some cheap drama. Judging by the state of American media, that’s the only way to get you people to respond with dollars.

The way I figure it, all I’ve gotta do is make Snuffy stand up to some unreasonable authority and cry as he learns hard lessons about the world while simultaneously embroiling Malex in some kind of heart-wrenching love story or another. We’ll be instantly rich!

Linus would stay the same though. He’ll be the crotchety comedy relief that nobody can relate to.

Sound fun? If my calculations are correct, the television deals should start rolling in any second now.

ttyl!

——Alex Markley

“Sleep deprivation, it’s a wonderful thing.”

Transcript

~~ Introduction

Malex: Welcome to the show, everybody! I’m Malex, your host.

Snufflefungus: Malex Minute Quarter Fourteen!

Malex: Yes!

Snufflefungus: Fourteen!

Malex: Yes.

Snufflefungus: It’s like the four, only just starting to grow up and being all awkward and full of attitude!

Malex: Yeah…

Snufflefungus: It’s a very big number.

Linus: Snufflefungus, Malex has no soul. He can’t understand numbers. He can’t even speak of his own volition. It’s really just a stunningly elaborate ventriloquism act. Watch and be amazed!

Snufflefungus: Amazed!

Malex: Linus, please shut up.

Linus: Sure thing boss.

Snufflefungus: Can we stop doing the show and look at the photo album?

Linus: No! I hate photos!

Snufflefungus: But why? This one has you in it!

~~ Begin flashback.

Linus: (Gasps.) Snuffy! Snuffy! Come quick! I can’t get the coat hanger out of the wall!

Snufflefungus: Linus! We’re not supposed to put things in electrical outlets! Besides, how did you do it in the first place? You’re a floating laptop!

Linus: Never you mind! Just grab it and get it out of the wall!

Snufflefungus: Okay!

Linus: (Disappointed.) Aw, telekinesis.

~~ End flashback.

Linus: (Sighs.)

Snufflefungus: … You know, you never did tell me how you got it in there. It must’ve been a real feat!

Linus: Hush, fuzzy pom-pom of despair!

Malex: Ah, memories. Oh, you guys remember this one?

Snufflefungus: That was from our first airplane ride!

~~ Begin flashback.

Linus: (Ill.) Malex.

Malex: Yes?

Linus: …I may throw up on you.

Snufflefungus: Ooh! Lookie, Malex! Aren’t the clouds pretty?

Malex: I can’t see them, Snuffy. You’re the only one with the window seat.

Snufflefungus: Oh, I don’t have a window seat! I’m standing on this person’s lap because I wanted to see out the window!

Malex: And do you know whose lap you’re standing on?

Snufflefungus: Nope, complete stranger! He’s going to be my best friend! (Gasps.) Oh look at how tiny the little cars are driving around on the roads down there!

Linus: Oh… There are little critters trying to build a temple in my stomach.

~~ End flashback.

Snufflefungus: I love vacations!

Linus: What on earth is that a picture of?

Malex: You know… I don’t remember. I can’t quite tell.

Snufflefungus: Maybe it’s a rhinoceros! I’ve heard of them before.

Malex: I don’t think so… It looks more like a closet.

Snufflefungus: Oh, look at this one! Remember? When Evil Snuffy came over to visit?

~~ Begin flashback.

Evil Snuffy: I am Evil Snuffy! (Laughing.) Aha! Do you know what this is?! This is a doomsday device! If you don’t all do my bidding, I will bring forth the end of the world as you know it! (More laughing.)

Malex: Evil Snuffy, give me back my razor.

Evil Snuffy: Not until you do my bidding!

Snufflefungus: Yay, bidding!

Linus: You can’t end the world with that.

Evil Snuffy: …Really?

Malex: Yeah, I hate to break it to ya’ pal, but my razor is not a doomsday device. I use it to shave my face.

Evil Snuffy: (Silence.) … Oh… Can I cut you with it?

Malex: No.

~~ End flashback.

Malex: We don’t let him visit very often.

Snufflefungus: Yeah, his visits do always bring cherries and ambivalence!

Linus: This is boring. Can I have a party?

Malex: Why would I give you a party?

Linus: Because if you don’t, I’m going to take one by force.

Snufflefungus: (Gasps.) Bad Linus!

Malex: Okay, well, I guess that’s it for this episode. Thanks for joining us everybody, and we hope to see you again next week as we fish around desperately for something interesting to talk about!

Snufflefungus: Good night! Er– morning! Er–

~~ End

Credits

Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writers: Peter Markley and Alex Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Leela

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Peter Markley

Recording assistance: Leela

Thanks to Yatpo for use of the Flashback sound effect.

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

NameSizeAction
Episode Audio2.44 MB Download Now - 2.44 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Episode Illustration163.18 KB Download Now - 163.18 KB View Now - Episode Illustration

Comments

HAHA!!!

"Malex doesn't have a tail and horn" XD says who? (:)

That was a great episode! Did you take real script from an episode with Evil Snuffy or did you write that this week, too?

Fave quotes:

Snufflefungus: … You know, you never did tell me how you got it in there. It must’ve been a real feat!

Linus: Hush, fuzzy pom-pom of despair!

XD I rather like the idea of Snuffy being a pom-pom XD

Malex: We don’t let [Evil Snuffy] visit very often.

Snufflefungus: Yeah, his visits do always bring cherries and ambivalence!

*lol* But I like cherries! :P ...I must remember to use "ambivalence" in the near future... (:)

Linus: This is boring. Can I have a party?

Malex: Why would I give you a party?

Linus: Because if you don’t, I’m going to take one by force.

Snufflefungus: (Gasps.) Bad Linus!

XD I'd like to see him try! :P

Great episode! Love it!

Praise the Lord! Hallelu!

I don't care what the devil's gonna do!

The Word and faith is my sword and shield

And Jesus is Lord of the way I feel!

"Hey Linus, whachya drawing?"

Lol! I like this one! The coat hanger trick was awfully mean of Linus though. Good thing Snuffy's telekinesis protected him from it. X-D

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Hmm...

Okay, this is not your best episode, guys. It's funny, but it doesn't really stand out. I like the concept of Linus being airsick, though. If he did throw up, what would it be like?

Snufflefungus: Nope, complete stranger! He’s going to be my best friend! (Gasps.) Oh look at how tiny the little cars are driving around on the roads down there!

Linus: Oh… There are little critters trying to build a temple in my stomach.

Snuffy is so cute! And poor Linus.

The illustration though, is exceptionally good, Quartz. I like how the pictures make sense. You must have worked hard on this.

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Peter's picture

Thanks!

I'm sorry the episode wasn't as funny as some. :-\ I guess nothing very crazy happens... I meant the craziness to be more in the flashbacks this time, but I guess it didn't quite pan out.

We never heard this particular interaction with Evil Snuffy in another episode, although it does exhibit typical Evil Snuffy behavior. ;)

Linus has been sick before. Remember Malex Minute 043?

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

Wow...

Poor Linus....being sick is no fun...I liked the ending. That was pretty funny...

God gave us music, that we might pray without words

Gabriel's picture

Wow, Malex

lol, your thoughts are amazing! X-D

Malex said:

Sorry, things aren’t really that bad. I’m just playing up the situation for some cheap drama. Judging by the state of American media, that’s the only way to get you people to respond with dollars.

The way I figure it, all I’ve gotta do is make Snuffy stand up to some unreasonable authority and cry as he learns hard lessons about the world while simultaneously embroiling Malex in some kind of heart-wrenching love story or another. We’ll be instantly rich!

...And ingenious... <_< >_> Let's try it!!! =D

God answers my prayers. He lifts me up. He gives me my breaths and refills my cup.

Lilly's picture

ROFL!

I love the "Hush, fuzzy pom pom of despair," line XD

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

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