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Malex Minute 160

Malex and Linus have a conversation about computers and sheep! Does anybody know what anybody is talking about anymore? Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think!

Episode Audio

Malex's Thoughts

As I write this, I have just finished spreading jam on a piece of bread with a steak knife.

Neither the jam nor the bread were being unwieldy enough to warrant such extremes, I assure you. No, I was using a steak knife because I haven’t done my dishes, so appropriate spreading knives are scarce.

But washing the dishes isn’t the only thing I need to get done tonight. My sweetheart is coming into town to visit me tomorrow! I will be at work all day, so I won’t have any time to clean unless I do it tonight! I need to clean up my pile of dirty laundry, put away some clean laundry, clean up a dreadful mess of cords, put the dining room table back in the dining room, and I was really hoping to sweep, mop, vacuum, dust, and clean the bathroom! For the love of Pete, she can’t know that I’m a slob!

And I have to get up and go to a meeting in less than six hours.

I’m not sure, but it’s just possible something might slip. Like a cog in my brain.

Oh yeah, and here’s a Malex Minute episode. Enjoy!


——Alex Markley

“Now Johnny, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times! ‘No’ means, ‘Throw a tantrum!’”


~~ Introduction

Malex: I’m telling you, it’s just the GUI!

Snufflefungus: What are you guys talking about?

Linus: Hush, Snuffy! We’re trying to think.

Malex: I bet they’ve fixed these problems you’re talking about in subversion.

Linus: (Challenging.) Well why don’t you download it and see?

Snufflefungus: Whose subversion? What?

Malex: Alright, I’ll do that! Let’s see here… Uh… This’ll take a minute to check out.

Linus: It’s as if it has to travel by steamboat and get written permission from Queen Elizabeth II just to draw a couple of Bézier curves.

Malex: (Weary.) Ah, alright settle down, Linus. Let’s just look at the problem. Why don’t you try tailing the message log and see if there’s any relevant information in there.

Linus: There never is!

Snufflefungus: But Queen Elizabeth II doesn’t–

Linus: I know Snuffy, please. We’re trying to work.

Snufflefungus: Sorry…

Linus: Oh, and the Gaussian filter? Don’t even touch the Gaussian filter! If you do, it goes and tries to get written permission from Elizabeth the First!

Malex: Okay, I’ve grabbed a snapshot of head. Let’s configure and make!

Linus: If you think it’ll help… Did you look at the docs?

Malex: The ones on their website weren’t very informative.

Linus: Just cat the read-me, stupid!

Malex: I know! I’m getting to it… Sheesh.

Snufflefungus: Hey um–

Linus: Snuffy, the grown-ups are trying to fix the computer. Why don’t you go and play?

Snufflefungus: I just wanna know what version you were using!

Malex: Eh, he’s using something like zero dot four.

Snufflefungus: Ouch. What’re you doing, Linus, archeology? Anyway, you don’t have to build it out of subversion to see the latest bug fixes! We packaged new RPMs last week!

Linus: Wait, really? Does it take care of those ice ages of inactivity whenever I touch the scroll bar?

Snufflefungus: Yeah!

Malex: Wow, this new version does seem to work very well.

Snufflefungus: In fact, I completely reimplemented the Cairo integration and put in some sweet optimizations.

Malex: Snuffy, I didn’t know you were a contributor for the project!

Snufflefungus: I’m one of its main developers!

Linus: Where are all your sheep?

Malex: Say what?

Linus: Your sheep! You know, sheep!

Malex: Um… Sheep?

Snufflefungus: Linus, who said anything about sheep?

Linus: We’re… We’re talking about advanced sheep breeding techniques, aren’t we?

Snufflefungus: No, we’re talking about SVG vector editing.

Linus: This is supposed to be Wonder Shearer, an open source sheep population projection tool, isn’t it?

Malex: …No.

Linus: Fine! If you don’t want to talk about sheep, I don’t want to talk at all!

~~ Silence.

Malex: Well… He went out in a huff, didn’t he?

Snufflefungus: Linus and his sheep. Tisk, tisk, tisk.

Malex: Yeah… So, on to the agenda for this episode! We’ve invented a brilliant new system for saving us all the harrowing task of sorting socks every time they’ve been washed!

Snufflefungus: Yes, it’s so simple!

Malex: I just can’t imagine why no one thought to–

~~ Sheep noise.

Malex: A sheep?!

Snufflefungus: Hello, sheep! You’re a nice little sheep, aren’t you? Yes you are… And look, you brought all your friends!

~~ More sheep noises.

Malex: Too many sheep!

Linus: (Sarcastic.) Oh, didn’t you want to talk about sheep? Now you have no choice!

Malex: (Screams.)

Linus: (Laughs manically.) I’ll show you sheep! Taste sheep! Ha ha ha!

~~ End


Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writer: Peter Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Leela

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Peter Markley

Recording assistance: Leela

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

Episode Audio2.43 MB Download Now - 2.43 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Episode Illustration187.51 KB Download Now - 187.51 KB View Now - Episode Illustration


Dot... Dot... Dot...

Too... Many... Big... Words...

Too... Many... Sheep...

Just... Enough... Madness... XD

Awesome episode, guys =D

A lie would have no sense unless the truth were felt as dangerous.

Peter's picture


Thanks, I’m glad you liked it! XD

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)


That was a *sidesplitting* episode! XD (I only say that because I have a stomach ache. ;) Lame pun, I know)

Gotta love the little sheepies, man!


But it was absolutely *hilarious* and I loved the yawn at the end! ...Mostly because I do that too... XD

Wonderful way to start my day. (Yes I am fully aware one's day should start between 6 and 8. I am also fully aware that it is 11 'o' clock in the morning. Spring Break is amazing! :D )

Thanks guys and Leela! :D

Praise the Lord! Hallelu!

I don't care what the devil's gonna do!

The Word and faith is my sword and shield

And Jesus is Lord of the way I feel!

Susie Markley's picture


*Loved putting together the tail*

*Hides from Fopsworth*

#HowManyLicksDoesItTake to change a lightbulb?


I loved this episode. I've been the unwilling witness to many of these sorts of conversations and my response is usually either to see the humor (like when Oz told a friend on the phone to "tweak it to get the demons up and running) or to let my eyes glaze over. I have a friend from Hong Kong, and when we go out to lunch or something and she encounters another Chinese friend, they go into rapid fire Cantonese that leaves me sitting alone playing with the tableware. Computerese has the same effect.

But I must say, I enjoyed the sheep angle.

Great work, guys. Whichever of you wrote this one sure scored big! I laughed so hard!

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Peter's picture


Thanks a lot! XD I’m so glad everybody likes it!

I must apologize, Leela, for the credits still so routinely listing Fopsworth as the post-processing director. I hope we can eventually rely on it correctly crediting you from the get-go! @-D

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)


I don't get it.....sorry

God gave us music, that we might pray without words

Lilly's picture


I'm still laughing from this episode! XD

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

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