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Malex Minute 110

Snufflefungus climbs some trees and Linus has a problem! Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think.

Episode Audio

Malex's Thoughts

Apparently it is very difficult for Snufflefungus to imagine a situation in which a bunny is un-cute. That is to say, in Snufflefungus’s mind, un-cute is the same as not bunny.

Linus’s particular situation is inspired by the incredible amount of computer time that was required to render our latest short film.

The short film, by the way, is stupendously amazing. You must watch it. Quickly, before it’s too late!

Have you watched it yet? Good.

So yeah, we’re extremely pleased to have that out the door. It represents a massive leap forward in our production skills, and I’m very much looking forward to seeing a significant increase in the quality of future work.

Speaking of future work, I’m pretty sure my brain is on fire. Gotta go!

ttyl!

——Alex Markley

“Quick, little Johnny! The only cure for brain freeze is to eat that ice cream faster!”

Transcript

~~ Introduction

Malex: Hey everybody, Malex here, and I’m hosting the show, along with–

Snufflefungus: I’m so happy! It’s spring outside! Spring is so happy! Happy is so outside!

Malex: Yes, the weather does seem to be shaping up quite nicely, don’t you agree, Linus?

Linus: (Long delay…) Yes.

Malex: Uh, right! So what’s been going on lately, Snufflefungus?

Snufflefungus: I made up a game! It’s really really fun!

Malex: Oh?

Snufflefungus: It’s called, “Guess Which Bunny Is Cuter?” I have two little bunnies here. You’re supposed to guess which one is cuter!

Malex: Um… I’m gonna pick this one. The other one is a rock.

Snufflefungus: Aha, but you answered too quickly! Is that your final answer?

Malex: Yes.

Snufflefungus: Are you sure?

Malex: It’s… a rock. I don’t think it qualifies as cute.

Snufflefungus: Hmm… Maybe this game is a little too easy.

Linus: Ha, ha! That’s no bunny, that’s a rock!

Malex: Yes. I think we already established that.

Snufflefungus: Maybe I could throw in an extra item for people to guess on. That’ll throw ’em.

Malex: So… Has anything else been going on, Snuffy?

Snufflefungus: Uh-huh! I’ve been climbing trees!

Malex: Well that sounds– Wait… How are you climbing trees with no arms or legs?

Snufflefungus: I have telekinesis!

Malex: Right, but that only allows you to interact with objects relative to yourself… You can’t manipulate your own body relative to the objects. That’s why you have to hop instead of flying, right?

Snufflefungus: Yes, yes. I’ve heard it all before. But I am climbing trees nevertheless!

Malex: Which trees, exactly?

Snufflefungus: Remember that big tree in the back yard?

Malex: The one looming four stories over our house? How could I not remember that one?

Snufflefungus: I conquered it!

Malex: My, what convoluted wording! Whatever could you– whoa!

Snufflefungus: See? Conquered!

Malex: I do see. So instead of lifting yourself up to the top of the tree, you pulled the top of the tree down to you.

Snufflefungus: It was hard work!

Malex: I imagine. The entire tree seems to be submerged underneath the topsoil.

Snufflefungus: Yep, I didn’t end up very high off the ground, but I was definitely at the top of the tree.

Malex: I may have to ask you to refrain from climbing any other trees, Snufflefungus. I don’t think the yard can take any more of this.

Snufflefungus: Oh, okay.

Linus: Why does that sound so ominous?

Snufflefungus: (Awkward) Uh, what sounds ominous?

Malex: Don’t mind him, he’s responding to a statement from thirty seconds ago.

Snufflefungus: Oh, okay! So if I can’t pull any more trees down to ground level, can we build stairs up to all the trees I want to climb?

Malex: Well I don’t know. What do you think, Linus? Will you help Snufflefungus build stairs up to the treetop?

~~ Long delay…

Snufflefungus: Maybe we should–

Linus: I think we should teach the trees to grow with steps already on them!

Snufflefungus: But that wouldn’t help me now, would it? Malex, I think Linus is broken again.

Linus: And another thing!

Malex: Yeah, I started a clustering program running on all my computers. It’s running a massive simulation, trying to solve cancer.

Snufflefungus: Is cancer a math problem?

Malex: No, but if you–

Linus: (Yells.) That explains the fog in my brain!

Snufflefungus: Uh… Can’t you speed him up? He’s not really useful like this.

Malex: Well, I could make him more responsive, but there might be… Consequences.

Snufflefungus: Please. Anything’s better than this.

Malex: Alright, here we go…

Linus: (Much faster.) Oh, wow! That’s so much better! (Cuts off in the middle of a word. Long pause. Then finishes word.) I hate having to– (Cuts off again. Long pause.) Arrgh!

Snufflefungus: Okay, I was wrong, this isn’t better.

Linus: (Continues glitchy sobbing in background.)

Malex: Where’s he off to now?

Snufflefungus: He’s glitching away! After him!

Malex: Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, I guess that’s it for today. Thanks for listening, and we hope you’ll join us again next week on the Malex Minute!

~~ End

Credits

Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writers: Alex Markley and Peter Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Gabriel Markley

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Peter Markley

Recording assistance: Leela

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

NameSizeAction
Episode Audio2.68 MB Download Now - 2.68 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Episode Illustration136 KB Download Now - 136 KB View Now - Episode Illustration

Comments

Great one!

That is to say, in Snufflefungus’s mind, un-cute is the same as not bunny.

Oh, that explains the rock, then. I couln't figure out why Snuffy would ask Malex to compare two bunnies, and then show him a bunny and a rock! But now it is all coming together in my head...yes.

Poor Linus, it must stink to be 30 seconds too slow in all of your responses...only, perhaps he does not realize that he is slow, because he can't process info fast enough to realize that he's not processing info fast enough... @-D Hmmmm

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

- Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

- Proverbs 3:5-6

Nicely Done

I loved the thought of snufflefungus pulling the tree down into the gound, could you imagine driving by a house with a slowly shrinking tree! And Linus' responses are so late that it makes them comments strange yet hilarious! ;-) I really liked it!

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As I sometimes say, "Won't you torture me enouph tomorrow!"

Graduation is coming, everybody grab your caps and gowns!

Superb!

I was having to brush away tears this time, boys.

Snuffy conquering a tree! It's so cute! He couldn't possibly get any more innocent!

Linus slowing down like that is perfect. It ruins his whole witty repartee cause he timing is completely off. But then him glitching is funny too. I hate it when my computer does that, 'specially when I'm trying to watch a video.

And the picture! I like the way the ground is warped inward like a pulled rug! Amazing job, Quartz.

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"You can't prune a tree with a shotgun." - Richard Hammond

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Alex's picture

Eh...

"I was having to brush away tears this time, boys." --Aisling

I'm terribly sorry. On behalf of my entire team, I must apologize for saddening you. We will do our best to make sure it never happens again.

--Alex Markley

"Crap, I have levitation class at 25:131. Better set the alarm to 'cinnamon'."

Alex Markley

“Arrogance is bliss! Or is that ignorance? Either way, I win!”

Peter's picture

Ah

I’m so glad you all liked it! XD It’s such a joy to make a Malex Minute!

Aisling said:

And the picture! I like the way the ground is warped inward like a pulled rug! Amazing job, Quartz.

*lol* Thank you!

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“... But as for me, I trust in [God.]” -Psalm 55:23

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

Amazing, everyone!

Another triumph for the MMNites. Good for little Snuffy, conquering the tree. Now, if he had just climbed it, then moved it back up, he could ride it elevator-like to its full height. He could perhaps do this over and over. But I'm not sure the tree would survive.

Linus' glitchy sobbing really cracked me up! Poor Linus.

If for Snuffy un-cute = not bunny, how did he hope to fool Malex with an item that was not cute and therefore obviously not a bunny?

This is one of the funniest illustrations I've seen for the Minute. Linus just looks so...not Linusy!

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I get up, I walk, I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing. - Hillel

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Peter's picture

Hehehe

Thank you, I’m so glad you enjoyed it! XD

Hehe, maybe he figured that since not everyone always seems to be able to see all the cuteness in the world that he sees, Malex’s senses for the contrast between a bunny and a rock might be duller than his. :D Either that or Snuffy thought that even the rock was cute on some level, just not with the magnitude of the bunny’s cuteness...

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“... But as for me, I trust in [God.]” -Psalm 55:23

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

It's been a while

It's been a while since I've laughed so hard listening to a minute. I was having a crappy week full of violent mood swings and mindless rants, and listening to this minute put me in a really good mood. Thanks for that.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

If someone tells you that there is no such thing as truth, they are telling you not to believe them.

A lie would have no sense unless the truth were felt as dangerous.

Peter's picture

Gee

I’m honored, DragonMan! :-J Thank you!

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“... But as for me, I trust in [God.]” -Psalm 55:23

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

Well Said DM

I have also had a crapy week. Not as bad as DM's week but not good all the same. I really liked the episode. I really liked the part when Snuffy "Conquered" the tree. Also I like the picture this week Quartz. Keep up the good work guys, and see you next week.

..............................

Orochimaru: Ah, perfect timing. Ha, Ha. Got you Sarutobi. Little did you know that I was really Orochimaru in disguises.

Hokage: Uh, I pretty much knew that from the beginning.

Orochimaru: What? How did you know?

Hokage: You never took off you "I am Naruto" Shirt.

Orochimaru: Shut up its cool.

Mike- Hey Bob, you know what I hate?

Bob- What’s that Mike?

Mike- Giant Snakes that pop out of nowhere and kill ya.

Bob- You know, I hate those too.

“Crash.”

Random guard tower guy- Wow, good thing that was the guard tower next to us.

Eh-heh!

I like your sig, DM. A very good observation. X-D

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"You can't prune a tree with a shotgun." - Richard Hammond

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Peter's picture

Ah

Well thank you very much! :) I’m glad it helped cheer you up too.

-------

“... But as for me, I trust in [God.]” -Psalm 55:23

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

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