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Malex Minute 103

Snufflefungus is blue?! Give it a listen and let us know what you think.

Episode Audio

Malex's Thoughts

Snufflefungi were never meant to be blue. I think I feel justified in stating this fact.

It might be interesting to note that I was pretty sick during the recording of this episode. I could barely hear my own voice, and by the end of the recording process I was so tired I went and took a nap.

Crazy, huh?

In fact, I was sure my voice would sound strange and stuffy in the recording, but listening to it now it seems pretty okay.

Anyway, we’re hard at work right now preparing for next week’s party!

Frankly, it looks like it’s going to be a blast and I really think you need to come.

For one thing, the whole “live Malex Minute recording” should be enough to send waves of anticipation right into your fragile cerebral cortex. For another thing, we’re giving away free stuff at the party!

Now, I had already mentioned that we were giving away free stuff to everyone who walks in the door, but I didn’t reveal any of the juicy details!

The big one is a free CD. Now, this is no ordinary CD. This is a special, magical CD. Specifically, a CD with Malex Minute Quarter Seven burned onto it! Now, you may be wondering, “What’s the big deal? It’s a CD full of stuff I can download for free on the Internet!” Well, if that’s what you’re wondering, you’d only be half right!

This is the first time that a Malex Minute quarter has been offered to the public at uncompressed CD quality. Compared to the low-bitrate mono MP3 files we offer as free downloads, you’ll be amazed at the difference CD quality makes!

Equally fun, but more sticky and less compatible with your CD player: Stickers!

We had about a thousand stickers printed up for this party. And these aren’t the crummy stickers we used to get, either. These are the real deal. They’re made of durable vinyl and the ink is slathered on so thick you can feel it raised above the surface of the sticker. It’s precision, high quality, full color, and (oh yeah) the design is cool too!

Of course, you’ll have to come to the party to find out exactly what that design is.

Remember, the Party is March 1st, which is Next Saturday!

Hope to see you there!

——Alex Markley

“Eventually, he will be forced to come to the horrifying conclusion that the future doesn’t exist.”

Transcript

~~ Introduction

Malex: Howdy, everybody. Malex here. Apparently, ’tis the season to be sick, as everyone seems to be passing something on to somebody.

Snufflefungus: Even I’m sick!

Malex: Hey, looks who’s finally awake– Whoa! Snuffy, you’re blue!

Snufflefungus: I have a case of blue-fur-itis.

Malex: What in the world…?

Linus: Hey Malex, I think we’re out of blue spray paint.

Malex: Oh really.

Linus: (Laughs) Ha ha, what happened to Snuffwad? Trying out a new ‘look,’ are you? That’s a laugh and a half!

Malex: Linus, how could you?! You’re always playing practical jokes and telling poor Snuffy lies like it’s all a game to you. But this is too far! Have you no shame?

Linus: What are you talking about?

Malex: Oh don’t be ridiculous, you’re not squirming out of this one! You spray-painted Snufflefungus blue!

Linus: I think I’d remember something that funny.

Malex: (Anger) Don’t deny it, I won’t stand for it!

Snufflefungus: Malex?

Malex: (More Anger) I could take away your physical body again faster than you can spit! You’d better apologize this minute to poor–

Snufflefungus: Malex!

Malex: (Still Angry.) What?!

Snufflefungus: Blue-fur-itis is a real symptom among us Snufflefungi. It just means I got a cold. (Sneezes.)

~~ Silence.

Malex: Really?

Snufflefungus: Yeah. This isn’t spray paint.

Malex: Well… I’m sorry, Linus.

Linus: You’ll get over it.

Snufflefungus: Malex, I can’t help but notice that it’s snowing outside. Does that mean we can have another Christmas this season?

Linus: Snuffy, that’s not snow! It’s white sand – the hottest kind. This is your summer by the way, so enjoy it.

Snufflefungus: Hey… (Skeptical) That’s not really true, is it?

Linus: No really, would I lie to you?

Snufflefungus: Oh. Of course not! I believe you Linus!

Malex: So, Linus, do you want me to yell at you again?!

Linus: No, I’m earning the yelling from two minutes ago. It’s called reverse-causality, doofus.

Malex: Snuffy, Linus’s words are not true. It really is snowing, not sanding.

Snufflefungus: I wish the world would make up its mind.

Malex: But this doesn’t mean Christmas is coming again… At least, not any time soon. Snow happens long after the Holidays are over and well into the new year.

Snufflefungus: Is it gonna snow forever?

Malex: No, just for a few more weeks.

Snufflefungus: (Cheerful) Okay!

Linus: The gods must be angry at us. They’re punishing us with weeks and weeks of terrible weather.

Malex: Oh be quiet, Linus.

Snufflefungus: Malex, if I’m not too sick, can I go out and play in the snow?

Linus: No Snuffy, don’t do it! Summer is meant to be enjoyed from a distance! The sand and the hot sun will burn you!

Malex: I’m not sure, Snufflefungus, maybe it would be best if you just stayed in and rested.

Snufflefungus: Yeah, okay.

Linus: Say, you all remember the Dust Bowl, don’t you?

Snufflefungus: You mean the drought that swept the Great Plains of western Kansas, Oklahoma, and the Texas panhandle in the 1930s?

Linus: Yeah, that one.

Malex: Well I wasn’t really there, but it sounded horrible. Giant walls of blackness descended on people’s homes, and the almost decade-long dust storm reduced the whole area to a barren wasteland. I’d bet even Snuffy’s trademark cheerfulness filter would have had some difficulty blocking that out…

Linus: Yeah, sounds fun.

Snufflefungus: Malex, were you just talking about something sad? I couldn’t hear a word you said.

~~ Silence.

Malex: Why are we talking about sad things on a comedy show anyway?

Linus: I dunno! You got a better idea?

Malex: Not really…

Linus: You’re as boring as they come. You know that?

Malex: (Sighs.)

Snufflefungus: Hey look, it’s not snowing so much anymore.

Malex: Okay you know what, I think we’d better end this before we lose any more creative momentum. Thanks for listening Ladies and Gentlemen, and we hope you’ll join us again next week for another exciting Malex Minute!

~~ End

Credits

Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writers: Peter Markley and Alex Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Gabriel Markley

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Peter Markley

Recording assistance: Aisling

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

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Episode Audio2.55 MB Download Now - 2.55 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Episode Illustration200.86 KB Download Now - 200.86 KB View Now - Episode Illustration

Comments

Mariel 7's picture

YAY first comment

Malex: Howdy, everybody. Malex here. Apparently, ’tis the season to be sick, as everyone seems to be passing something on to somebody.

It's true - but not for me! I'm finally getting over my ... whatever ... that I've been in and out of for almost a month. Yay for me and no one else!!! <3 X-D ;-)

Snufflefungus: I have a case of blue-fur-itis.

Malex: What in the world...?

Linus: Hey Malex, I think we’re out of blue spray paint.

You've gotta admit, it is KINDA suspicious :-P And I wouldn't put it past Linus :-|

Snufflefungus: Blue-fur-itis is a real symptom among us Snufflefungi. It just means I got a cold. (Sneezes.)

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWw :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*

Linus: Snuffy, that’s not snow! It’s white sand - the hottest kind. This is your summer by the way, so enjoy it.

Snufflefungus: Hey... (Skeptical) That’s not really true, is it?

Linus: No really, would I lie to you?

Snufflefungus: Oh. Of course not! I believe you Linus!

LINUS!!!!! :-|

I'm really proud of Snuffy, though. He started to be able to tell that Linus wasn't telling the truth - then his innocent trusting nature took over :-*

Snufflefungus: Is it gonna snow forever?

No, but atleast it's snowing today and I HAVE A SNOW DAY X-D X-D X-D - hopefully the last one of the year, cause it needs to stop snowing right now :-| or, you know soon :-)

Snufflefungus: Malex, were you just talking about something sad? I couldn’t hear a word you said.

~~ Silence.

Malex: Why are we talking about sad things on a comedy show anyway?

Because there's no happiness left in the world - it's all been redirected to keeping Snuffy cheerful, for without a cheerful Snuffy the universe will collapse in on itself ... wow that was a lot less funny then I hoped it would be ... maybe I'm actually right :-((. But at least Snuffy's immune <3

------------------------------

Moo.

... what you expected something deep and intellectual? What universe are you from?!

SCI-EENNNNCE!!!! @_@ - Dr. Insano

Lilly's picture

Made my day

I really enjoyed this episode X-D

But that tail was... gross X-|

------------------------------

His intended message is, “Scream, and the world screams with you. Laugh, and your face will burst in flames.”

Linus: Why Malex, you're making more sense than usual today!

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

Like little children.

Malex: So, Linus, do you want me to yell at you again?!

Linus: No, I’m earning the yelling from two minutes ago.

I remember when I was little and I used to think that way. Then I got older and learned that the world doesn't work like that...

------------------------------

Waddya hear? Waddya say?

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Yep, you guys are sick

Yep, Malex, your voice sounds like you're sick. It can't be easy to be funny when you feel cruddy. But you guys sure did a good job.

I don't believe they're really out of blue spray paint. I think Linus just said that to bait Malex.

I hope everybody starts feeling better pretty soon.

------------------------------

I get up, I walk, I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing. - Hillel

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

I haven't been sick since January!!!!!!

And I plan on keeping it that way!!!!... But my brother has been really sick lately :-(( But he is getting better as we speak!!!!!! :-D

----------------------

I love the theatre!!!!!

Graduation is coming, everybody grab your caps and gowns!

Feeling better?

Seen on a church bulletin during the minister's illness:

GOD IS GOOD

Dr. Hargreaves is better.

------------------------------

Waddya hear? Waddya say?

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Comments

lol, what a goof up for a church bulletin!

Great job, guys! High quality entertainment, as usual. I especially like Linus' comment about reverse causation, lol. I know I've felt that way. When I was little, if my parents disciplined me and I felt that my punishment was unjustified (which it never was...I just didn't want to admit it), it made me feel like doing something bad/disrespectful on purpose, just to spite them. You know what Solomon said..."Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of discipline will remove it far from him." Prov. 22:15 (Hurray for spanking! Lol, it saved my life :-D )

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

- Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

- Proverbs 3:5-6

Peter's picture

Hehe

Yeah, me too! Thanks, Noble Wisdom! :)

And thanks to everyone for their wonderful feedback! I'm so glad the Malex Minute continues to entertain. XD

-------

Gaussian Blur fixes everything.

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

Hehe

This was very funny and I liked it as well...

But I missed getting first comment because I fell asleep and didnt have school in the morning D;

So I slept in.

Mwahah

--------------

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Peter's picture

That's okay!

XD Sleep is nice! |-)

-------

Gaussian Blur fixes everything.

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

Even sicker

My cold has now become bronchitis. Darn it!

------------------------------

I get up, I walk, I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing. - Hillel

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Mariel 7's picture

uggh, ow

I hope mine doesn't come to that :-(( :-(| X-|

(yeah, that's right - I had ANOTHER relapse of my cold. The first one was due to the stomach flu, the second one was due to the universe's sick sense of humor :-| )

------------------------------

Moo.

... what you expected something deep and intellectual? What universe are you from?!

SCI-EENNNNCE!!!! @_@ - Dr. Insano

Lilly's picture

Picture

I love the picture in the picture, Snufffy has earmuffs! X-D

------------------------------

His intended message is, “Scream, and the world screams with you. Laugh, and your face will burst in flames.”

Linus: Why Malex, you're making more sense than usual today!

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

Please pray!

I'm so tired of being sick and being around sickness. Please pray that my whole family would get well in time for the party on Saturday. If I have to miss this party, I'm gonna hold my breath till I turn..well..blue.

------------------------------

I get up, I walk, I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing. - Hillel

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Peter's picture

Hehe

Yep! XD

I'm glad you like it. :D

-------

Gaussian Blur fixes everything.

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy (Contradictionary - Party)

=(

My brother is getting over his cold, but now I have it!!! :-( Pray that it goes away before the party ...AND THE PLAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

------------------

I love the theatre!!!!!

Graduation is coming, everybody grab your caps and gowns!

Lilly's picture

*smiling through surgical mask*

I've managed to stay pretty healthy

------------------------------

His intended message is, “Scream, and the world screams with you. Laugh, and your face will burst in flames.”

Linus: Why Malex, you're making more sense than usual today!

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

Interesting to see...

Since you're actually pink I figure that you'd only be able to manage a shade of purple before you passed out.

------------------------------

Waddya hear? Waddya say?

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Same here.

I can't get sick. If I do, the house would, I imagine, crash and burn in flames like a malfunctioning rocket re-entering the atmosphere.

------------------------------

Waddya hear? Waddya say?

Everything looks perfect from far away.

Lilly's picture

Picturing it

*starts to picture it* *Can't see anything unusual happening* ( ;-) )

------------------------------

His intended message is, “Scream, and the world screams with you. Laugh, and your face will burst in flames.”

Linus: Why Malex, you're making more sense than usual today!

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

Puh-leese!!

Ais said: Since you're actually pink I figure that you'd only be able to manage a shade of purple before you passed out.

Please! Lavender. Orchid, perhaps. NOT purple!

Lilly said: *starts to picture it* *Can't see anything unusual happening* Good point. Perhaps you know us too well. *narrows eyes at Lilly* You'll stay safe as long as you don't talk.

------------------------------

I get up, I walk, I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing. - Hillel

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Lilly's picture

O.O

Yes mam

-----------------------------

His intended message is, “Scream, and the world screams with you. Laugh, and your face will burst in flames.”

Linus: Why Malex, you're making more sense than usual today!

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest- Owl City

X-D

LOL

------------------------------

Waddya hear? Waddya say?

Everything looks perfect from far away.

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