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Malex Minute 001

Brace yourself, the insanity is returning… (The introductory episode of the Malex Minute.)

Episode Audio

Transcript

Malex: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Malex Minute! ‘Malex’ because we couldn’t trick anybody famous into doing it, and ‘Minute’ because any longer would make you lose your will to live!

Malex: You know, I’m quite excited about our first episode here. This is our first attempt at anything vaguely resembling a ‘podcast’ – a fancy, schmancy word that here means “Digital Radio or Television show which can be experienced whether you have an iPod or not, no matter how much Apple would like you to believe otherwise!”

Malex: On this show, I expect to discuss everything from recent developments on the entertainment industry front to the current status of the Malex Media Network, with the occasional stab at current political situations in between.

Malex: I also expect we’ll be bringing in various people and interviewing them. Failing that, we’ll corner various people and interview them – an exhilarating, albeit frequently unsatisfactory solution.

Malex: Since we couldn’t really think of anything interesting to fill our time with today, we chose to interview a small furry creature that we discovered trying to break into the studio last night.

Creature: I’m in a cage!

Malex: That’s right, I put you there. What do you call yourself?

Creature: Yourself?

Malex: No, not me. Look, don’t start. What is your name?

Creature: I don’t know, I lost my memory.

Malex: Okay, so what were you looking for in the studio?

Creature: My memory.

Malex: …Oh, that’s grand. What did it do, manifest itself as a hideous arthropod and flee screaming from your misshapen skull?

Creature: I don’t remember… It’s all so vague…

Linus: Boss, I think he’s hiding something.

Malex: Linus, just run the equipment and try not to kill anything.

Linus: You know, if brains were dynamite, you’d be all alone.

Malex: I’ll ignore that… Okay folks! Looks like we’re well over our minute, but who actually took that literally? If you’ve somehow managed to lose your will to live, we’re genuinely sorry in a gee-that’s-too-bad-but-it’s-not-our-fault-so-don’t-sue-us kinda way.

Creature: If anybody has seen my memories, please tell them that I miss them.

Malex: …Until next week, keep warm and don’t feed the snufflefungus. Today’s show was brought to you by the Malex Media Network. Please visit us online at MalexMedia.Net. God Bless and good day!

Credits

Producer and Director: Alex Markley

Writer: Alex Markley

Voices: Markley Brothers

Post-processing director: Alex Markley

Illustration: Peter Markley

Release manager: Alex Markley

Thanks to everyone for their help and support. :)

Media Downloads

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Episode Audio1.34 MB Download Now - 1.34 MB Listen Now - Episode Audio
Classic Malex Minute Illustration309.15 KB Download Now - 309.15 KB View Now - Classic Malex Minute Illustration

Comments

Peter's picture

Credit

I did the voice of the creature, for all who haven't met me in person or can't tell anyway.

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Can you truthfully and conclusively answer anything to this question other than "Yes"?

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy, Contradictionary - Party

Cute Critter!

I love the little creature's voice! It sounds cute and sick at the same time!

What's greatest about it is that it's not enhanced in any way, Quartz did that voice on his own. It's really funny.

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Some write because they are writers. Others write because they have a story to tell.

Everything looks perfect from far away.

That was awesome!

That was awesome! Can I be a guest sometime? Or maybie you should talk to Bukers. If it would behave long enough.

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"I'd offer a suggestion, but you wouldn't listen, no one ever does."-Marvin, the depressed robot.

Alex's picture

Always good.

Yes, we need to book guests for the show. We love talking to people, so if you're interested, send me an email (or just talk to me) and we'll schedule something.

ttyl!

--Alex Markley

Then, suddenly, Agent Dully vanished in a puff of narrative intervention, and was never seen again.

Alex Markley

“Arrogance is bliss! Or is that ignorance? Either way, I win!”

Peter's picture

The Creature

I didn't want to be a gyuest, but you didn't ask me. Maybe you'we deswiminating against peopwe who've leyost their memowy.

...Sorry, I just really doing like that character. I don't know why.

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Can you truthfully and conclusively answer anything to this question other than "Yes"?

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy, Contradictionary - Party

oh wow...

At first I thought those were typos...

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Some write because they are writers. Others write because they have a story to tell.

Everything looks perfect from far away.

!!!!!!!!!!

THEY'RE NOT! :-O Is anyone else worried? Quartz? Are you okay? Poor dude. 0_0

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"I'd offer a suggestion, but you wouldn't listen, no one ever does."-Marvin, the depressed robot.

Poor creature

I love this creature SO much! :-* Maybe it's because the voice sounds a little babyish to me. And he's vulnerable because he's in a cage AND he lost his memories.

Malex, you should do something nice for the creature!

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Just keep swimming!

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Peter's picture

Oops.

0_0 Now I'm really sorry...

*whistles "the Entertainer"* Everybody pretend you didn't read a thing.

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Can you truthfully and conclusively answer anything to this question other than "Yes"?

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy, Contradictionary - Party

Susie Markley's picture

LINUS!

Linus is REALLY mean! I don't like him at all.

But I must admit that I just love the little creature!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I'm twice as tall of half of you, and half as tall as twice of you. -Bill Boy: "Lord Of The Beans"

#HowManyLicksDoesItTake to change a lightbulb?

Alex's picture

Oops!

Sorry guys, I guess I accidentally broke this episode a while back. It's fixed now...

--Alex Markley

Then, suddenly, Agent Dully vanished in a puff of narrative intervention, and was never seen again.

Alex Markley

“Arrogance is bliss! Or is that ignorance? Either way, I win!”

MikeFerenchak's picture

that scared me but great job

that scared me but great job

-MICHÆL-

Peter's picture

Thanks!

We try. :D

Glad to see you online! I hope you like it here.

“Timby, I know you’re awake! Don’t lie!” –Nixy, Contradictionary - Party

Down Memory Lane

I want to download and listen to all of these episodes. I haven't listened to them in a long time, and I miss the whole gang.

We should take our comfort from God's word, not from the circumstances of our lives.

Alex's picture

I know.

SangMing said:

I miss the whole gang.

Me too. Not to worry though, we haven't heard the last from all of our friends in Ohioville. :)

Alex Markley

“Arrogance is bliss! Or is that ignorance? Either way, I win!”

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